guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
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