dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
