I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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