hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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