Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
