i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
