would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize