We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
