there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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