his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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