just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
