Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
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