I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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