her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
