More tranny stories later!
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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