you guys were way drunker than both of me
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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