hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
