i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
