I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
