so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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