Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
