You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
