My hand turned me down
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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