i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
