I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
