Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
