Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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