Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles

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  (212): Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles http://tfl.nu/ttbo
  Replies (5) Good night (601) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables

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  (214): New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables http://tfl.nu/m9ex
  Replies (27) Good night (6219) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave

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  (617): he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave http://tfl.nu/ypxh
  Replies (32) Good night (612) Bad night (4989)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  I really should sober up and deal with this hangover

  (941): View more from Florida

  It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though

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  (941): I really should sober up and deal with this hangover (941): It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though http://tfl.nu/cygd
  Replies (5) Good night (2054) Bad night (875)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense

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  (207): My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense http://tfl.nu/p3xl
  Replies (11) Good night (6300) Bad night (990)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.

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  (484): I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me. http://tfl.nu/20bq
  Replies (7) Good night (2523) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?

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  (304): Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps? http://tfl.nu/jolf
  Replies (13) Good night (4243) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him

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  (416): He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him http://tfl.nu/ykad
  Replies (12) Good night (2491) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.

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  (630): Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms. http://tfl.nu/uuzs
  Replies (13) Good night (781) Bad night (2272)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"

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  (816): You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?" http://tfl.nu/o1ln
  Replies (10) Good night (1819) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?

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  (610): Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits? http://tfl.nu/td8v
  Replies (15) Good night (2035) Bad night (449)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.

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  (919): I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career. http://tfl.nu/kw3u
  Replies (14) Good night (1917) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.

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  (202): I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out. http://tfl.nu/03ma
  Replies (4) Good night (702) Bad night (360)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Why were you not born a dude?

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  Because god wanted to level the playing field

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  (727): Why were you not born a dude? (1-727): Because god wanted to level the playing field http://tfl.nu/5cfo
  Replies (3) Good night (955) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups

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  (610): Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups http://tfl.nu/pbun
  Replies (3) Good night (471) Bad night (223)

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