What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
