I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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