she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
