He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
