Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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