I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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