Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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