So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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