she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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