I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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