my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
