how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize