you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
