we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize