Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??

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  (810): Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me?? http://tfl.nu/91ci
  Replies (2) Good night (988) Bad night (1400)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.

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  (403): My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator. http://tfl.nu/0m79
  Replies (12) Good night (1019) Bad night (3899)
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  (831): View more from California

  I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.

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  (831): I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco. http://tfl.nu/qnto
  Replies (34) Good night (3279) Bad night (479)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.

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  (720): Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown (303): I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself. http://tfl.nu/zmkv
  Replies (44) Good night (8494) Bad night (966)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I wish life had little blips of pornography

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  (778): I wish life had little blips of pornography http://tfl.nu/kuwx
  Replies (27) Good night (3905) Bad night (1147)
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  (661): View more from California

  It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.

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  (661): It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing. http://tfl.nu/ex7a
  Replies (116) Good night (11561) Bad night (1781)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went

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  (630): Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went http://tfl.nu/usqw
  Replies (32) Good night (1039) Bad night (7021)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.

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  (404): It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated. http://tfl.nu/7ila
  Replies (6) Good night (2935) Bad night (640)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.

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  (979): Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine. http://tfl.nu/p1v5
  Replies (3) Good night (1681) Bad night (579)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?

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  (479): Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace? http://tfl.nu/xfzk
  Replies (2) Good night (1377) Bad night (767)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.

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  (518): Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke. http://tfl.nu/lmdn
  Replies (8) Good night (1309) Bad night (1230)
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  (626): View more from California

  Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.

  (1-626): View more from California

  This is why you don't have nice things.

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  (626): Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread. (1-626): This is why you don't have nice things. http://tfl.nu/swqp
  Replies (3) Good night (1360) Bad night (663)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA

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  (214): IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA http://tfl.nu/ecmd
  Replies (16) Good night (763) Bad night (885)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.

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  (202): I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party. http://tfl.nu/j3cs
  Replies (15) Good night (585) Bad night (1274)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.

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  (501): Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again. http://tfl.nu/b8kl
  Replies (2) Good night (995) Bad night (221)

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