I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize