wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
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