YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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