he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
