handjob tips. give me some.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
