Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize