Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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