Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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