I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize