Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Randomize
