there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
