alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
